Gimme Got Shot

So, Lovegirl has been in sports camp this summer.  She’s definitely enjoyed it, and I’m glad I made the decision to enroll her.  I’m still tripped out when I see/hear my little kid doing a cheer “I can slide and slide and do the butterfly.  I can dip and dip and shake my little hips…”  But that’s a matter for another day.

Today I’d like to discuss – and get feedback on – stuff.  Over the course of the last few days, my child has gone from being content playing with empty paper towel rolls and plastic straws to wanting every.darn.thing.  I exaggerate, but only slightly.  Mama can I have:  a pillow pet, a b.arbie, a PSP, a perm (yeah, that’s a whole ‘nother post too..), and the list goes on.

Lovegirl never even played with dolls and all of a sudden she wants a b.arbie.  What’s up with that?  So I asked her.  Oh, she wants one because two girls at camp have one.  And she want a PSP because so and so has one and somebody else told her she’d probably get one when she’s six.  She also wants a “tindo.”  I finally figured out she meant N.intendo.  She doesn’t even know what she’s asking for – she just wants it because the other kids have it.

I realize this is perfectly natural and follows us (sometimes to our own detriment) into adulthood.  But I’m still a little concerned at the sudden need to have what everybody else has – even if she doesn’t necessarily even want it.

My parents were usually like, yeah, no.  I do remember getting a few things I specifically asked for – though that happened very infrequently.  I credit their refusal with my not being caught up in a lot of “stuff” now.  Once I got past high school, I really didn’t care about brand name stuff, keeping up with the Jones’, etc.  Smoochy on the other hand is was way into brand names and stuff.  I still remember a huge disagreement we had when we were newly married – we were out shopping and he wanted a polo shirt.  So I went over to the polo shirts and started picking colors.  He looked at me like I was nuts and went over to the P.olo section and started picking up $70 shirts with little horses on them.  Oh hells naw.  I was like “Ralph L.auren doesn’t pay our bills are you crazy?”  And he was like “I can’t walk around wearing a generic shirt – everybody wears P.olo.”  Okay, bet.  Here’s $70.  Buy one shirt or three I don’t care.  11 years later, he’s pretty much come over to my side :)

Anyhoo, I’m rambling a bit….Have you dealt with this with your children?  How did you handle?  Do you remember going through this as a child?  How’d your parents deal?

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13 thoughts on “Gimme Got Shot

  1. My mother was very adamant about not wearing clothes/purses with names on it which has evolved to me not only not wanting clothes with names but not wanting clothes with symbols. I feel like at least clothing-wise I look near my age! A girl at my old job said she wants everyone to know exactly how much she spent on her stuff which is why she rocks the symbols. *head tilt* I’d rather have MORE great quality stuff but to each his own. Glad to know you won’t be buying out my size.

  2. dmac says:

    If you think its bad now, give it a few years. Little girls in elementary school are on the regular 2 week hair, mani & pedi cycle. My son wants an ey.eph.one and I guess he’s forgotten that the only reason he has a phone at all is because he rides the bus to school now. Peer pressure is a trip is all I can say!

  3. My mom stuck to her guns about not getting caught up in name brands and everything. To this day, I don’t care what the brand it as long as it looks good on me and the kid. My child has asked for everything, including the sun. He gets toys every now and then. But not all wants are purchased. And I plan to keep it that way.

  4. pserendipity says:

    I must admit, I will not buy Aidan anything but name brand tennis shoes. Anything else, don’t really care about. Thankfully, the only thing he ever asks for is that darned PSP. He swears when he’s 6, he’s gonna get one. Hmm….that sounds familiar. But honestly, depending on how his first semester of kindergarten works out, there may be one in his future at Christmas.

    Nah, I side-eyed myself just for saying that.

  5. naijamodel says:

    My parents dealt by NOT. HAVING. IT. Lol!
    Seriously, my mother was Mt Zion which could not be moved when it came to keeping us on par with other kids. She would look you in the eye and say “NO. And you know what will happen if you ask me for something foolish again!”.

    We got treats every once in a while, but my mother was frugal, and she is plain. Unless you could give a compelling reason about why you “earned” something (e.g. all A’s in school), my parents wouldn’t even consider pricey trendy items.

  6. jeanine says:

    It’s a phase. The longer you say no, the quicker she will get over it. Trust me.

    My kids went thru this as soon as they both got in daycare/more exposure to tv.

    A quick cure for my more stubborn younger daughter was a couple of Saturdays in a soup kitchen. I thought it was corny, but it surely worked.

  7. mamasez says:

    I entered the “ministry” when our first child was born and was able to successfully carry that ministry through until they all left home. It was the “Ministry of NO!” At some point, all of our four lovely children have asked for/wanted a brand name this or whatever the other kids were sporting that day/week/month. I have nooooo problem say AND meaning nooooo.

    She will eventually learn what will fly and what will not. Stick to your “no” and join the Ministry of NO before it’s too late!

  8. What up with that??!! I don’t know but they made a song about it. Wanna hear it? Here it go: http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/what-up-with-that/1167696/

    Let me stop. I just love that skit so much. LOL

    Anyway, I have to admit that I was pretty spoiled when it came toys and clothes. That’s not to say that I got absolutely everything I wanted but ‘yes’ seemed to outweigh ‘no’ a majority of the time. Ironically, I didn’t really ask for a lot of things. It was mainly around my birthday and Christmas that I got really greedy. Plus, I liked to play outside a lot with my BFF riding bikes, making mud pies, etc., etc., etc. Perhaps that’s why she didn’t mind when I asked.

  9. LMAO says:

    I was pretty spoiled coming up not by my mom, whom I lived with but, by my dad and aunt who bought nearly everything I looked at, let alone asked for!! However, this was not a good thing as I carried that spoiled attitude well into adulthood and slept on a few good guys who IMO weren’t spoiling me enough and for years my finances were in ruins…..thus,my kids earn their own money with regular and extra chores as well as odd jobs for friends/family then I ask them if they see the value in spending their little earnings on over priced, usually poor quality, name brand stuff…They are 11,12 and 17 – usually if Mommy is NOT doing the buying – they pass on those items!

  10. My parents were pretty good at keeping me grounded. Looking back, I realize now that we were middle/upper class growing up, but I never knew that. I had chores and there was no such thing as an allowance. I never looked through a catalog to make a Christmas or birthday list. I expressed liking certain things – sometimes I got them, sometimes I didn’t. *lol* Hopefully this is a phase that will pass. My son isn’t old enough yet, so I don’t have to worry yet.

  11. Jurista says:

    Buddha is 4 and he is in the “I want…” phase where EVERY. SINGLE. SENTENCE begins with those two words. Ugh. He wants a pillow pet, ice cream, chips, a Wii, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Dragonball Z, and I could go on but you get the idea.

    My response is to completely ignore him. Well, that is after I explained to him that beginning every sentence with a demand was not cool and slightly obnoxious. I’m a fan of positive reinforcement so I don’t acknowledge that behavior—until it gets out of hand and then I get snappy and/or sarcastic and tell him, “Well, I want a million dollars. We all don’t get what we want.”

    He usually is quiet because he doesn’t understand my answer but at least he gets quiet. I know, I’m not going for the parent of the year award, lol.

  12. Jazz says:

    I do wear name brand purses and shoes . Other than that , I dont wear things because of the name . I dont wear anything because of the name on it actually. The things I buy , I buy because I like the item and because it doesnt have a big dumb logo on it . I buy for quality , not because its the latest from Phat. Baby or roca wear

  13. t. sheree says:

    I don’t have any children, but my parents had NO problem saying no. I think it hurt so much to hear them say no that I rarely asked for anything, lol. It continued on through high school, and I’m glad that it did. I like nice things and buy them ON SALE, and I feel like I’m pretty level-headed when it comes to making purchases.

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