Lovegirl: Mama, what’s the name of the song that’s on the radio?
Nerd Girl: I don’t know.
Lovegirl: Because you’re not important?
Nerd Girl: (Well damn, how’d she figure that out) Well honey, we’re all important in our own special way.
Lovegirl: Yeah, but not like God is important. He knows everything. You’re not important like God is important.
Nerd Girl: Do you mean omnipotent?
Lovegirl: Yeah, omnipotent. God is omnipotent – He knows everything! And you don’t.
The joys of having a child who attends a Christian school never cease to amaze me.
Lovegirl: Mama, can you look in my pants pocket and take out the piece of purple candy that’s in there?
Nerd Girl: Go to sleep. Yes, I’ll take the candy out. Where did you get candy?
Lovegirl: From school. I got it for being disobedient.
Nerd Girl: What? You got candy for being disobedient?
Lovegirl: Yep. I was disobedient and then I looked really sad and said “I’m soooo sorry.” And I got a piece of candy. I was so happy Mama!
Who is the inexperienced teacher that fell for that?
Nerd Girl: Have a good day at school little girl.
Lovegirl: Mama, we’d better pray about that.
Nerd Girl: Why? We prayed about your being obedient and making good choices last night.
Lovegirl: Yeah, but we’d better pray again – I’m not sure once is enough!
I can’t say she didn’t warn me . . .