Nerd Girl: Yes?
Lovegirl: The world would be so much better if more people looked like me.
Self esteem? Check. Humility? Not so much.
* * * * *
Lovegirl: Mama, I need a band aid.
Nerd Girl: For what?
Lovegirl: I’ve got grape juice coming out of my knee.
Nerd Girl: What?
Lovegirl: Grape juice. It’s coming out of my knee. I need a band aid.
Nerd Girl: Honey, that’s not grape juice, that’s blood.
Lovgirl: Blood, grape juice, I am so confused. At church they say you’re drinking the blood of Jesus. Then you told me it wasn’t really blood, it was grape juice. Then I tell you there’s grape juice coming out of my knee and you say it is blood. I don’t know what y’all are talking about!
Note to self: must figure out how to explain symbolism to 5 year old.
* * * * *
I got the results of Lovegirl’s standardized testing back. Overall, she did really well. Apparently she listens on a 6th grade level. Which my Mom says is impossible – she doesn’t stop talking long enough to listen – much less on a 6th grade level. Ouch. But true. And…she scored below average in one area. Life. Yeah, life. How the heck does a 5 year old score below average in life?!? Is she on the playground smoking blunts, drinking 40s and talking about going to the club??? What does this even mean? I give.