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Somewhere Over the Rainbow…

So, what do you think about the whole gay marriage thing?

My thoughts are basically:  a) I think homosexuals should be allowed to marry as not allowing it is discrimination, and b) I feel like a bad Christian for being okay with gay marriage. 

What are your thoughts?  Are you conflicted over this issue?

Just a reminder – please keep your comments civil.  Not that any of my regular commenters need to be reminded of this 🙂



35 thoughts on “Somewhere Over the Rainbow…

  1. While I don’t normally comment, I thought I would get in on this. I don’t think the government should control who does and does not get married. I am not conflicted, I am a Christian, but also don’t feel like it’s my right to determine what the world does and doesn’t do.

    • I agree for the most part. My conviction comes from something our pastor said a few weeks ago in Bible study. I’m paraphrasing, but he basically said that when we as Christians sit around and don’t speak up for/against something, everything becomes “okay” and soon we conform to this world instead of changing it. Or something like that…don’t quote me. And I started wondering if the decline of our community (not just as it relates to gay marriage) is because more people don’t speak out against those things which we should.

  2. I don’t think it should be called marriage as marriage is clearly defined as being between a man and a woman; but I do think they should have the same rights that everyone has. I think Christians should try to listen and minister more to homosexuals instead of immediately condemning. I like this article about it – http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2013/january-february/my-train-wreck-conversion.html?paging=off
    I’m not conflicted as a christian in this area; I think politics creates the conflict and Christians feel that they have to choose sides. If we followed Jesus example we wouldn’t be so quick to condemn.

  3. I was talking about this with hubs this AM and he doesn’t like the term marriage being used, he must prefers the more legalese sounding “civil union”, as do I. I personally think the gay community would have gotten a lot more traction on this issue had they used the used the civil union terminology since what they are really seeking are a lot of the LEGAL benefits of marriage that are bestowed by the government. Really to be honest, everyone should have a civil union established by the governement and that way the symbolism behind religious marriage would have been left alone. in the grand scheme of things, IDC IDC IDC. I am much more worried about my OWN marriage that anyone else’s. That probably makes me a bad Christian. Oh well. That’s for God to decide, not man.

    • I’d decided that I too was cool with civil union. Until I heard the woman (she’s 85!) who is responsible for the suit. She wanted to be married to her partner. Yes, for the legal benefits that come along with marriage (I believe she had to pay over 300K in estate taxes because her marriage wasn’t legal and her wife’s estate was seen as a gift instead of an inheritance…or something like that) but this woman also wanted to be married – for the romance of it, for the language of it, for the religious aspect of it.

  4. I have been thinking about this a lot b/c everytime I go to read news online it’s all about gay marriage and what the Supreme Court will do. And I was thinking a couple days ago I wished my church would do some sort of class or something on this topic.. I guess I should just study it more myself. I do feel convicted b/c I don’t want anyone feeling less than or discriminated but I do believe that God intended marriage to be for a man and woman and in my personal readings I specifically remember reading Paul admonishing “men being with men” relationships.. Nylse’s comment was very good and now I’m off to read this article. Isn’t it funny that sometimes we are strict/stern about certain sins that we judge and are harsher on and others we overlook? I have to keep reminding myself that sin is sin…

    • That’s why I intentionally didn’t ask if y’all thought homosexuality is a sin – I look at the issue as one of civil rights. I think homosexuality is a sin, but like you said, no worse than any other. We let liars marry. We let thieves marry, etc., etc., So homosexuality as a sin (for those who believe in sin) doesn’t really seem to be a strong argument against gay marriage.

      • I read an article earlier in the week about if homosexuals are allowed to be married, then what stops marriage from being b/t 2 people? What about people who want to have more than one wife? Where does it stop or should there just be a free for all for anyone who wants an arrangement?

  5. I believe that 2 consenting adults of legal age should be able to marry regardless of gender. If an adult can sign a contract, join the Army, start a business, pay taxes…etc. Then there is NO legal reason why that same adult should not be able to marry another adult.

    I totally understand when some people believe that same sex marriage violates what they believe God intended marriage to be. I can not and will not argue the Religious aspect of this. My head and heart will argue to the end that it should be LEGAL and sanction by every State. Each person’s relationship with God is their business and theirs alone.

    • I’m a Christian and I sit in Catholic Church every Sunday and listen to Priest and a Congregation that condems Gay marriage. I still remain NON conflicted. Marriage should only be a religious ceremony/ union if the couple choses that. Because in this Country Atheist are also allowed to marry.

      • Agreed. I wonder though, why this has to be a state’s rights issue. It makes no sense to me that you can be married and recognized in one state, but not in another AND federal benefits aren’t afforded to gays.

      • Amen, thank you for putting it so well, I too am a non-conflicted Catholic, despite what my church says, I feel as you do in my heart. In our great country there is a seperation between church and state, therefore, religious aspect of the debate has no place.

  6. I’m a Christian and I’m in the civil union bucket. But I’m also conflicted because there are heterosexuals that make a mockery of marriage and they aren’t condemned.

    Like Serenity said, it’s crazy how some sins are ‘acceptable’ and others are not.

    • I’ve always thought it’s an issue of homosexuality being that one sin that people are pretty sure they’d never commit. We can see ourselves lying, cheating, stealing, committing adultery, but unless you’re gay/bi it’s a pretty sure bet that you’ll never have homosexual sex.

  7. I feel like this is a fight over a word. I am willing to give the word marriage over. I’m going to start
    referring to my situation as a covenant. Some unions are by theories of contract, others are by beliefs of covenants. If two or three or more people want to contract in a union – let them. The covenant is based in faith and belief. It has existed for ages.

    I think the division occurs because people who consider marriage as a contract don’t get why those who consider marriage a covenant, care what two contracting adults do. Covenant folks hold marriage in a unique esteem and don’t understand that for many, marriage is just a contact.

    I am not conflicted over the issue. I expect same-sex marriage to exist at some point, I just don’t look forward to being called an ism, ist or phobic for names for considering its existence problematic.

    On the other hand, I am anxious to see bigamists come out and sue for their equal rights. I think same-sex marriage will make a way for many different types of marital configurations. A bigamist should be able to have all his/her spouses covered by insurance and get legal benefits.

  8. This is a legal issue. Plain and simple. Separation of church and state should be recognized here. It evolved for a reason. The religious argument has no place in the legal argument. At all. Legally, marriage is a contract. Plain and simple. As long as the two people are of age to enter into a contract, they should be able to. I don’t care if it’s two men, two women, one man, three women, two women, three men.

    I disagree wholeheartedly with labeling a legal contract between two men a civil union. Technically, I have a civil union because my vows were given by a judge not in a church. If it is a civil union, the same rights and benefits will not be extended. There are over TWO THOUSAND federal laws that use the word marriage. Do you think the federal government is going to go back and change all of them to say “and civil union?” Nope. Not gonna happen. More importantly, being allowed to enter into the SAME contract that heterosexual couples can allows for the extension of the SAME benefits.

    Labeling it a civil union sounds a whole lot like “separate but equal” and we see where that got us.

    • So, since you’re an atty, can you help me out with my reply to OneFromPhilly? If this becomes a state-by-state deal (which I gather is what the White House is aiming for) what does that mean for federal benefits and how they are/are not distributed? Would there need to be a Constitutional Amendment for homosexual couples to receive any/all benefits and rights afforded to heterosexual couples?

  9. I’ve never wavered on this issue and remain a supporter of same-sex couples being allowed the right to marry in the states\internationally\wherever they please. Live and let live.

    • Pretty much. I probably shouldn’t have used the term “bad Christian.” I just know that I believe in the right to choose and that differs from the church’s stance on things.

  10. I struggle with this because I have some issue with the redefinition of marriage. I have no issues with civil unions and think they should have the same benefits and responsibilities as marriage.

      • for me they are similar because there seems to be laws created because people feel uncomfortable and not because things are right. In the grand scheme who one marries shouldn’t affect or have an effect or anything or anyone but the 2 who choose to say the vows

  11. i think people should be allowed to marry whomever they want. I don’t have a problem with people loving who they love.

  12. I don’t have any reservations in supporting same-sex marriage. For me, it’s two-fold:

    1) I support the individuals who want to marry their partners. I have friends and family who are gay and it pains me that they may be denied (and are denied federally) the right to build their families because some people don’t agree with the way that they are. The way that I believe God made them.

    2) But the second (and maybe more important part IMO) is that it’s important to separate religious belief of groups from the laws that govern all of us, regardless of our religious beliefs. So, while I understand that some people believe that it’s a sin or that it shouldn’t be called marriage, we don’t all believe it’s a sin. I could get with civil unions as what the government grants to ALL couples, allowing people to get married in their own church, according to that church’s guidelines. I just don’t agree with imposing labels that come from religion on the laws of our country. Nor do I believe that the Constitution should be interpreted with those same religious ideas in mind. It’s not easy but I think it’s worthwhile to separate them so that everyone can be equally protected under the law.

    Disclaimer: I really hope this isn’t offensive to anyone. I read the language over a few times in the hopes of phrasing it without coming across as dismissive of people that believe that homosexuality is wrong.

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