Home » Life In General » Closed Mouths Don’t Get Fed. Ask For What You Need. You Have Not Because You Ask Not.

Closed Mouths Don’t Get Fed. Ask For What You Need. You Have Not Because You Ask Not.

I’m going to let you in on a little secret. I don’t like to ask for help. From anyone. I will run around like a chicken with my head cut off trying to figure out how to do something on my own before I’ll ask for help. I don’t know why I’m this way, but I am.

I will offer to help someone in a heartbeat. Well, generally. And if someone offers to help me, I will surely accept. But it is rare that I open my mouth and say “will you please help me?”

Y’all know I’m starting school on Monday right? Right. I’ll be in class two nights a week from 5:30 – 8:30 p.m. Let’s not even talk about how I like to go to bed at 8:00. Anyhoo. I’d decided I was going to pick LG up from school at 2:00 on those days, take her home, get her homework done, get her fed, run her to the sitter, sit in class for 3 hours, pick her up from the sitter, run home, get her showered and in the bed, study my notes, and fall asleep.

Then I had this genius-level epiphany: tell Smoochy you need help.

Now. I love my husband, and he’s an all around good fella. But I have to tell him what I need. He’s not all that intuitive, and really, he shouldn’t have to read my mind.

So I tell Smoochy “look. I know you love driving that truck. You enjoy not having a “boss.” You like your schedule, and I get that. But I’m getting ready to go back to school and I cannot do this I do not want to do this by myself. I’m going to need your help.”

And do you know what he said? “Okay.”

He has started filling out applications for trucking companies that advertise as having their drivers home each night. He told his current supervisor that he needs a change in his schedule and that if they couldn’t work something out there, he was going to have to move on. That he wants to stay with them, but he needs to be more involved at home.



I am feeling so relieved right about now. It may take a minute for Smoochy’s schedule to be the way that’ll work out best for us, but I am so thankful that he listened to what I was saying, agreed, and is making some moves. I am so glad I didn’t try to be Superwoman this go ’round.

I am definitely going to be less hesitant about asking for help when I need it from here out.

Now. Who wants to do my Biostatistics work for me? Anyone? Anyone?


8 thoughts on “Closed Mouths Don’t Get Fed. Ask For What You Need. You Have Not Because You Ask Not.

  1. I’m the same way about aking for help but for whatever reason this year I started to do better about it. Being a single parent is no easy task and sometimes I just need some time for myself, s I’ve been asking and accepting help. It feels pretty good.

  2. This may or may not have brought a tear to my eye! I love that you asked and he responded. I was wondering how you would handle school/LG/Life…but I knew you would…you just needed some help 🙂 Yay, Smoochy! Hope the change comes soon.

  3. I was an absolute ZERO in graduate Statistics. So for the sake of your GPA I’ll offer to step aside.

    YAY for Smoochy!!! Men are really very simple creatures. You ask..they answer.

  4. I wonder why its so hard to ask for help, even from folk we know will give it to us. You know, like our husbands and family. And I love that Smoochy said “okay” Men really like having smart wives. I bet he told his boss all about you working on a Ph.d.

  5. this post put a big old smile on my face! i love when men respond, I mean truly respond to us woman and our needs, and boy did Smoochy come through for you. I love it! I am the same way about asking for help but yet I am always trying to help others. Sometimes we can make things more complicated then they have to be.. the ask and you shall receive thing is a good reminder for us all. c

  6. That was a good piece. Like Your other posts, enjoyable. I ‘would’ help You with ‘Biostatistics’ if You only You would tell me what that is! Haha! 🙂

    Also, I would hate to keep calling You, or anybody, Nerd Girl and things like that. Am pretty old fashioned that way. Tell Us Your pretty name or dire consequences await You! You are warned!

    Love and Blessings. 🙂

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