I got an invitation to my new niece’s christening. It’ll be in Arkansas at the end of May. On one hand I’d love to meet my newest niece. On the other hand I’m pretty sure I don’t want to drive 8 hours to be dismissed by my brother and his wife. They’re supposed to be in CA with the rest of the family in June and I could just meet the baby then.
So blog familia, the question of the day is should I attend the christening in May? What would you do?
Nerd Girl 
Hold off. Send them a nice gift and meet the baby in June. 8 hours? AND it’s at their church? No thanks.
Do you think that the attendance at the christening will gauge whether they will come to Cali in June or not?
I don’t think so. We’re going to be in CA in June for my Grandma’s 90th birthday – her party was planned before sister-in-law got pg.
Just wait till June. But send a gift for her christening.
I know I’m new here (Hi, I’m Bridgette from Houston!) but here’s my two cents.
I would go because it’s family. Perhaps they sent the invitation in a way to extend the olive branch to you. This may be the act that can make or break your relationship. If you go, they may say “wow how nice that they drove 8 hours just for our baby’s christening”. If you don’t they can say “see I knew she didn’t care too much for us/the wife/the baby”. In our family, we will go completely out of our way for family so that obviously colors my answer.
Welcome! And thanks for your input!
I thought I replied but I agree with Bridgette.
If I was the closest family member and/or if no one else from his side of the family was attending, I’d go. If you really can’t swing it, I’d send a gift with a sweet note letting their baby family know how happy you are that you’re welcoming a new niece into the family.
June would be a great time to meet your new niece.
I agree with Bridgette. I’d go cause it’s your brother. I’m also available that weekend to go and make inappropriate comments. Just in case.
June, because it seems like what you are leaning towards. Even if your brother and sister in law have an attitude, they will be fine. A card and or gift would be nice.
I know what I have said previously about your brainwashed brother and his wife, but I think you should try to go if you can. Don’t do it for your brother, do it for the baby. Take lots of pictures. If your brother flakes on coming out to California, at least you’ll have the pictures to show the family.
Clearly with the instability of your SIL, it WILL be held against you if you don’t show up. Relations are strained enough. I say go.
I think you should go.
Go and enjoy your self and your time with family. When folks start wearing on your nerves, start your engines and head South!
I would choose to not go. To me (let me stress that), it’s not a big enough event to drive 8 hours. 1 or 2 maybe. But not 8. Esp. if you are going to see them the next month. I would hold off.
I wouldn’t go. If you know it’s going to annoy you, just wait and deal with them in June. Send a gift.
I wouldn’t attend. I’d just wait until june.
Eight hours is a long way to drive. I’d wait till June. The baby will still be a baby three months from now.
Totally unrelated but I saw these and thought of you. Did you ever find them? http://www.amazon.com/Sathers-Cinnamon-Bears-3-5-Ounce-Bags/dp/B000Y8YFO0
How sweet of you!!! I knew they were on Amazon, but so far I’ve resisted having them shipped to the house…my resolve likely won’t last much longer!
I’d go. If (God Forbid) something was to happen between christening and bday party, you’d never forgive yourself.
Plus, what if THEY don’t make it to the bday party?
Go, smile, and know you can leave if they begin to work your nerves.
I’ve really started to check my calendar lately. If something isn’t beneficial to me, I don’t go. However, this is family and if you don’t go, it’s possible that you won’t get the warm reception you want in June.
Eight hours? In a car? *faints* Is Southwest having a sale? Six hours is my limit and that’s pushing it. If I couldn’t get there by plane, I’d pass and wait to see them the next month.
Yes. If it was within my power, I would go.
If you don’t go she will probably tell your bro its because his family dislikes her so much that it extends to the baby. Now she’ll have reason not to fly herself and the baby across the country to be surrounded by people who dislike her. That will make it harder for him to bridge the divide.
My hubs mother and young b-i-l say I brainwashed my husband, that I am keeping him hostage and they told his best friend that I put stuff in his food for mind control. I am always on edge when we travel 20 miles to visit his relatives. The only ones I relax around and feel my kids are safe with, are the ones who came to visit my daughter when she was a newborn.
I think making that journey can only help in building and rebuilding family relationships.
Well . . . the comments have been mixed and there are some good points made on both sides of the argument. This is truly a damned if you and and damned if you don’t situation.
Your bro nor s-i-l will be overly welcoming and we already know that, but that’s on them. Go for the sake of the newest member of our family. Blood is thicker than the mud of The Frosted Flake.
Someone has to take the higher road. I’m glad I have trained you and Napoleon to do the right thang.
I/we will not be able to attend because they did not let us know far enough in advance even though we had told them that we would be cruising. They sent the invitation just after we had made the (nonrefundable) reservations. Of course, I would have gone otherwise.
You, Lovegirl, Napoleon and Hazel need to attend to represent “our side” . . . oh yeah, “our side of the family”. Otherwise her side will say that The Riddler does not have any family support. The party King probably won’t be able to make it . . . for a variety of reasons.
Maybe I’d go just to piss off the parents, maybe I’d go to show her family that we roll together no matter what, but I know I would go to be with my granddaughter! Call me crazy, tacky, unreasonable, whatever but you still have to call me Grandma!
@ ames — I have said the same thang about his wife and her mojo powers. But I know you are different :-).
I think you should go for all the reasons Bridgette & your mom pointed out.